This weekend, at the Independent...
THE CARPET BAGGER SPECIAL
It is mostly with fear and loathing that I announce that I have a bachelor party for a college friend coming to town this weekend, and, yes, it will be a shit show, and, yes, at some point, that shit show will land at the Independent. Disastrous. There is an upside to this absolutely terrible prospect. Ken (the bachelor -- he looks JUST like that guy on the TV show!) just opened Conshohocken Brewing Company, outside of Philadelphia, with a shiny new 15 barrel brewhouse, a lot of know-how (the former head-brewer of Yards is on board), and a set of brews that is getting ridiculously good reviews after Philly Craft Beer week.
Now, I know, Eastern, PA, right? That doesn't fit our definition of local, which has always been "Western, PA." Fair point. So why do it: (1) Ken's a very good friend and he opened a brewery in my home state; (2) Ken is kind of like the Lebron James of drinking, if Lebron James was three inches taller, could jump higher, shoot better, and had four more titles under his belt. When Ken opens a brewery, you buy their beer. Period. (3) This gives us another opportunity to bring you a beer that you won't find anywhere else in Pittsburgh; (4) We're going to be calling this the "carpet bagger special," and we're going to feature it periodically (i.e., whenever I go to Philly or whenever Ken comes to Pittsburgh, we'll haul some kegs). In other words, this decision isn't a break in philosophy, it's a brief dalliance with a good friend.*
Ken is dropping off the kegs tonight, and you should expect to see them come on one-by-one over the weekend.
QUIT FIRKIN AROUND!
On Saturday, our good friends at Four Seasons Brewing want to give their new Firkin a whirl (it's filled with their High Hopes, IPA, a crowd favorite) and gave us the honor of serving it. We'll serve it at cellar temperature (55-58 degrees), tap it on the bar, and pour beer into your glass right through its bung hole.** We tap it at 9 p.m. Don't miss it.
SUNDAY SECRET VAULT
We're extending sunday hours, with a special (and hopefully weekly) event that we're calling "Sunday Secret Vault." If the title gave you the expectation that we're turning the bar into a Sunday night porn theater, you're not far off. It won't feature smut videos, though. It's audio porn. Each week, we're going to bring in a curator to play records that are scarce and interesting. The idea is that Sundays are generally quiet, and a great time to listen to music, without having to hear the crowd. It's a great time to learn more about music and to expose yourself*** to genres, styles, artists, and eras with which you are not already familiar. This Sunday, Jeff Myers, digital marketing genius, jazz-guitar extraordinaire and all-around brilliant media mind will be curating. He's bringing the deep cuts. We're going to bring a ridiculous special from 6-9. All beers are $4. Boom. You only need to bring yourself (and, since we won't be serving food, some dinner you picked up or whipped up, if you so choose). This should be the laid-back, interesting and nerdy Sunday night you have been craving ever since Game of Thrones wrapped up for the season.****
Ok kids. I have a bachelor party to attend. Lock up the women and children, unless they're my wife and daughter, in which case I'll be checking in hourly in hushed tones, from bathrooms of various drinking establishments.
* This line probably isn't going to get you very far in your marriage. I mean, feel free to use it -- It's well-written, and if said sincerely and in an Arkansas drawl, it may just work. But much like your stock broker, I don't guarantee results, unless it's with regard to my unconventional, by-any-means, tough-but-fair police work. ("You're out of control, Kurzweg! I get results! Give me your badge and your gun -- You're on unpaid suspension! Fine! But City Hall can't stop me from bringing down this cock-fighting ring! Not while I'm still breathing!")
** This isn't a joke. That's what the tap hole on a firkin is actually called, a "bung hole." Although, let's all take this moment to remember the great Cornholio, the highly-caffeinated alter ego of Beavis, of Beavis and Butthead fame, who only wanted some TP for his bung hole. "ARE YOU THREATENING ME!"
*** Still not a porn theater
**** OMG! So good, right!